About the Life
Alisa stood in the middle of a huge office, nervously touching, weaving and compressing long fingers.
- It is possible one question? Immodest.
- Yes. – its interlocutor has with astonishment grinned.
- And you will not become angry? – It has even more fiercely compressed palms.
- I will not be. You can ask.
- You had something with Elena Petrovnoj?
The man confusedly, is faster from unexpectedness of a question, has coughed, has then looked Alise in eyes and has told lies:
- No. From what you took?
- It is difficult to explain. – Alisa has heaved a deep sigh, not daring to lift an eye. — I have felt it, when you talked to it. She is not afraid of you, as all the others. Feels easy. – Alisa has understood, that else slightly, and it will simply crash down in a faint from own incomprehensible boldness.
- No. You are mistaken. – Evgenie Eduardovich has sat down for the desktop. — I am simple to some people I treat kindly. Probably, it is evident.
Alisa knew, that he speaks a lie. But to mind has not dared. That lady already in the past has simply consoled for a long time itself in thought that. It was a pity, that he has not told all as is. And however, it initially had no right to set questions. Its unexpected, but the guarded attention, its mad love of the right such did not give to it. Alisa it was trampled a little on a place and left an office.
They have met, as has been agreed, at seven o'clock and already out of office. He passionately kissed it. She with the mixed feeling of fear and impossibility of an event could not even stir a hand. He embraced her, ironed, got hands under a blouse. It grew dumb and was angry with itself for inactivity. Also was afraid, that through a quarter of hour all will be behind – exclusively under its initiative and under its scenario. And tomorrow, having sated sudden "office" desire, anybody already what will not recollect.
Soon they have come to be in a bedroom. Windows here have been densely veiled by portieres, from the tiny tape recorder on prikrovatnoj to a bedside table music flew. «Traditions and banalities of the unlawful novel» — has mechanically thought Alisa. Evgenie has told, that it needs to wash and left.
Alisa sat, having fallen asleep in catalepsy. How much time she dreamt to be given to it! As often scrolled in a head the scenes colourful and filled with passion! The reality has appeared absolutely another – cold, frightening, dead. Alisa has closed eyes and it has tried to be transferred from another's unfamiliar apartment to the bedroom. It was possible to it. She saw the wide bed under a turquoise coverlet, a rack at a wall, up to the top filled by books and different knickknacks. Flowers on a window sill, a shaggy plush monkey in a corner, a fluffy cosy rug at a bed. Evgenie she too saw. It stood at a door and greedy ate her eyes, but did not dare to come nearer. It was the visitor, she is a mistress. Alisa felt in itself pleasant force and confidence. It was habitual sensation of the beautiful girl, and it floated in him like a duck to water. – the adult attractive and usually to excessive sweetness of the self-confident man – she enjoyed confusion of the elect.
-Close eyes. – has told Alisa, and Evgenie obeyed.
-Now turn away. – Alisa revelled in sensation of own superiority.
The-girl washing, — Evgenie has tenderly minded – I wish to look at you.
It-is impossible. – has shortly answered Alisa both has come nearer. – also do not take in head to stir to me.
-Was good. – Evgenie has blinked. Its eyelashes shook. – I will not be.
Alisa has approached even more close and began to unbutton a belt on its trousers. Evgenie has deeply sighed, but the eye has not opened. The girl with force has pulled a buckle, and the belt has obediently slipped to it in hands. Alisa has got hands of the victim for a back and has hardly pulled together them in its wrists brjuchnym with a belt.
That, you think, I will not be untied? – Evgenie breathed hard.
-Only try! – Alisa cautiously pushed Evgenie to a bed while it has not approached to it closely, and then with force has struck its palms in a breast. The man has fallen to a soft bed. The hands connected in wrists have appeared under weight of its own body. It has awkwardly turned sideways, and have dared to open eyes, at last.
-Zajka, you wish to anger me? – Whisper he has asked. – does not leave. And here to you only will be worse, because with the fastened hands I am not able to give to girls pleasure.
TH I will take care of the pleasure. — as with whisper has answered Alisa. Her eyes shone, and on cheeks there was a flush. – remember — I will be your tsarina, and do not dare even to try to touch me with hands! It is possible to do only that I order. To kiss there where I will tell. To move how I will order to you. Any independent gesture – and you will be severely punished.
Speaking, Alisa has moved apart a knee of his foot and has covered with a palm the hill which has bulked up under trousers …
Evgenie has returned to a bedroom already without a suit – in one towel. Alisa has begun to blink eyes. Some seconds have left to realise an event actually. Alisu has unpleasantly surprised that he so quickly and, not reflecting, has undressed. She has had time to think with disgust, that in the upper class it is not accepted, probably to subject to risk expensive clothes: suddenly something will be soiled, will tear or will simply lose the "ideal" kind. But all it was strange and even is insulting: it would not peep at all if Evgenie in a passion impulse in shreds breaks off its blouse and linen, has crumpled and has soiled a suit. Things have no value.
Evgenie has embraced its one hand for a waist, another – has started to pull down a jacket. In some minutes it already faced to it bared and shamed. Still slightly – and head Alisy has begun to spin. She was afraid of Evgenie the same as also all in their Ministry, and could not get rid of this disgusting feeling in any way. Evgenie has tumbled down it on a bed, began to kiss a hot damp mouth. Alisa tried to creep out from under it, but it has appeared extremely heavy. They struggled, and it has appeared more strongly. Through instant Alise it seemed, as if it break off on a part. It coiled and groaned. Then all has ended – almost as suddenly, as well as has begun. And it has powerlessly fallen to it.
- You – remarkable. – Alisa weighed and selected words. She understood, that it is necessary something to it to tell. – the best.
In the answer he only has more strong hugged her. Also did not release until it laid motionlessly, having covered eyes.
- You have fallen in love? – It has interrupted silence. Alisa has looked at it and has seen in pupils of a sparkle of laughter. Has answered nothing, only has liberated hands, it was discharged of it, and has hidden the person in pillows.
- Well, so it is difficult to answer a simple question? – Evgenie has again smiled and took it for a hand. – I here have precisely fallen in love and, similar, just now.
Alisa has lifted on Evgenie eyes and, closing the person bedsheets, has told:
- I too. Only earlier … — she has deeply sighed.
Also has distinctly realised suddenly, that both of them speak a lie.
Second time they have met a month later. Not that did not see absolutely. No, Evgenie passed by often Alisy at job, some times, when has been assured, that anybody them does not see and does not hear, even started talking or drew to itself to merge in short and too nervous kiss. And so, on the present alone, happens just now. Alisa already has had time to wean from it. It was necessary to begin all with the beginning. It was nervous. She was irritated with that she had not the right to vote, could not give up. He spoke "wait" – she waited, he spoke «come in three minutes» — it came, he has told "on Thursday evening" — she has not minded. Alisa died of a pain in a breast when thought that there is no man and women, and there is only an office subordination. She was angry, ceased to smile, decided, that more at all will not start talking to it. But there passed some days, and she fused. Replaced «anger with favour». And Evgenie had not time to notice at all, that she took offence at it or was dissatisfied. And all began at first.
He waited for it at an entrance. They silently have come. Have risen in the lift, Alisa did not know even on what floor though was here already in second time. Numerous locks in apartment doors foully rattled and not at once have given in Evgenie's to efforts.
- Well here, and suddenly locks have changed? – Alisa tried to joke, but at heart really has suddenly wanted, that the door has not opened. She has got used to dispose itself of time of enamoured men in it, to manipulate and feel assured. And here it did not turn out to show in any way own will and to enter into a habitual channel. She alternately felt herself that as the offended and thrown child, a puppy, involuntarily betrayed to the owner and answering wild delight on the most insignificant caress.
- From what you took, what should change? – Evgenie has apprehended its words seriously. Alisa raznervnichalas it is even more.
- Yes is not present. I simply tried to joke. – she has murmured.
- I have joked. – she has said a shivering voice, trying accurately to utter words — as the schoolgirl, answering a lesson. Its manner not to hear, vanishing in own thoughts, and then with a pressure to ask again «that?» Several times always its scarecrows also called disgust. She did not want, that he talked to it as with the numerous subordinates during the irritation moments. Also has again taken offence.
The lock, at last, has given in. They have entered. Alisa has covered behind itself a door and it was discharged, giving the chance to it to lock them in apartment. Evgenie has helped it to remove a raincoat, and has then passed in a room and villages on a sofa. Alisa, having drawn in under itself feet, has settled down nearby. Its nerves were on a limit, and he, apparently, felt uncomfortably. Even air became prickly from the general pressure. «Well and to whom all it is necessary? – Feverishly thought Alisa, — where me bears?».
- You know, I have taken offence at you.
- What?! – it has highly lifted eyebrows and has practically opened a mouth from surprise. Like its turn now would be to take offence at its long inattention.
- Well. You constantly state to me any it "is impossible" — to touch at job you it is impossible, with women to talk at you it is impossible. And then I start to be nervous on a theme «that in general is possible».
- Did not think, that you are capable to worry because of such trifles.
- Because of you — it is capable, if you yet have not understood.
Evgenie has not too dexterously pulled out a hand, trying to embrace Alisu and has sensitively enough touched with her elbow on a lip.
- Oh, excuse, please. Excuse! – he outright was frightened of the clumsy movement.
- Yes anything. – she has felt taste of blood on the lip broken by teeth. But outside of anything it was not appreciable, apparently. – it is not terrible.
It has drawn near Evgenie, and has put a head to it on a shoulder. And suddenly felt absolutely the little girl whom recently still offended and did not wish to accept «in game», and now have suddenly admitted, and had no value, she will win as a result or will lose. There was an admiration already with the feeling of participation.
Evgenie has tried to kiss her, but it was not gave – was afraid, that he will feel taste of blood on her lips. And in general, least it would like to move. She was afraid to spill inadvertently the pleasant catalepsy which has suddenly captured it. They have just now ceased to be people of the different worlds, the difference "poor-rich", "considerable-inutile", "mister-servant" was just now erased. She knew, what is it for a short while and as could, tried to keep a desired instant.
- Is not present any it "is impossible". – has slowly spoken Alisa.
- I wished to tell, that all is possible for you.
- Yes? And you will not be made to be jealous? It seemed to me, you are too jealous.
- Yes is not present. A lie. I am simple for limiting care. A head to lose it is impossible …
- You are Generally right. — he has thoughtfully said. – Perhaps to a bedroom we will go?
Alisa has obediently risen. Evgenie has followed it.
He has started to kiss they be more cautiously, than last time as if it suddenly became fragile and could break from any sharp movement and a notable pressure. She has completely obeyed to its mood and only tried to make out in a mirror of a toilet little table as they are looked together. It was not possible to it in any way – Evgenie a wide back blocked all review. Alisa it tried to be developed, but he has not allowed – whether guessed, that she wants, and did not aspire to show to it a picture «from the party», whether simply instinctively did not allow it to find though some active position. Today it had not enough time. It already pulled together from it a jacket when Alisa took it for a hand.
- What is? – Evgenie disappointedly and even hardly it is angry has sighed – time drew in. – you are unhealthy?
- Yes is not present. – Alisa has lowered hands. – that's all right.
- Good. – Evgenie has pressed it to itself. – I have hurried. Excuse.
Alisa has slipped out its embraces and village on an edge of a toilet little table.
- I will go I will wash. – Evgenie has thrown and left a bedroom.
Alisa has closed eyes. It improbably would like to burst into tears. But at him it even did not presume it. From all tried to calm down and force not to be afraid of itself. Before an internal look there was its own bedroom and two of them. The imagination drew a familiar and pleasant picture. Evgenie tenderly compressed her hand.
- You do not want me? – He has asked and has more close drawn near it.
- I do not want?! – Alisa was indignant. — I always want you, it would be possible to notice already.
- Yes. Has noticed. – Evgenie has smiled. — you – the dangerous and greedy girl.
- Then to what such questions? I simply do not want, that you looked at me so. I so am afraid.
- Also what to me to do? Again to close eyes?
- There is not enough. To close and fasten. – Alisa has felt itself as the mistress.
- My God, you though can make something without linkages? – Evgenie smiled, looking at it.
- I can. But not with you – you too dangerous and terrible here and so without ceremony to suppose you to yourself. – Alisa mentally carried on this dialogue and to it it became easier than that at least in imagination she could speak it the truth. — I and so has already done errors: has fallen in your embraces, it is possible to tell, has thrust. You have not put any efforts. Therefore it is necessary to put them now.
- Also what I should do?
- Well, first, to bend down. – Evgenie has obediently bent down, and Alisa has fastened to it eyes the scarf. He has in a pointed manner sighed. – Secondly, — Alisa began to drawl intentionally words and, taking Evgenie for shoulders to turn it round own axis, — to be twisted.
It has released Evgenie, and it by inertia has made still pair of turns.
- You remember, in the childhood game was such – a blind-man's-buff? And so. The same rules.
- Listen, well you constantly torment me? I do not remember anything.
- Yes?! – Alisa delano was surprised. – and me it seemed, you just were yesterday the boy. It is necessary to catch me only. You will catch – your will. Is not present – there's nothing to be done. We will consider, that we have simply decided to recollect the childhood.
- Anything to itself. – Evgenie helplessly stretched forward hands, trying to orient in its bedroom. — you not only greedy, you also severe.
- Droplets. Simply so it turns out. Well, you will catch or still we will chat and on it we will leave? – Alisa as if got drunk with sensation of freedom and own power.
Evgenie has really decided not to lose further time, and has vigorously moved on a voice. Alisa has providently become silent and has silently moved to the most distant corner, to racks. But to make a noise it was necessary to Evgenie – it was unexpectedly knocked by a knee about a bed. Alisa was silent. Then Evgenie, having extended a hand and providently feeling bed borders, has moved to detour. When it has come nearer so, that it needed to make pair of steps, Alisa has dropped in on the bed and has jumped off on other party. Evgenie has oriented quickly enough – the elastic scratch of a mattress did not leave doubts – and has followed to its example. Not having dared, the truth to drop in on a bed, it was simply rolled on other party. Has risen and has spent by air hands in hope to touch the girl. Alisa behaved silently and any signs of a life did not submit. On Evgenie's all attempts to force it to speak, she answered with silence. But has then decided to get over again on other party of a bed. Having heard a mattress scratch, it has rushed behind it and has caught for a foot. It has seized in Alisu both hands and dragged to itself, not having worked at all to pull together from eyes a bandage. The girl did not resist. Eventually, Evgenie has caught it and acquired now the full right to create with it everything, that wanted …
The bedroom door has squeaked. Alisa still sat on a toilet little table with the covered eyes. Evgenie silently has approached to it and, having embraced for a waist, has got up. Through thin blouse Alisa felt its wet torso. «If only he has not started talking, if only has not forced to open an eye» — thought Alisa. Evgenie silently has laid the girl on a bed, has crushed under itself and began to lift up the skirt impatiently braided and wound round feet. Again Evgenie's movements were sharp and fast, again Alise it seemed, that he aspires to break off it and to destroy. Then all has abated – Alisa was spread on a bed, and Evgenie has fallen to it and has pressed down so, that there was nothing to breathe.
- You – the sun! – he has whispered.
Alisa was afraid, that it can lie so still long-long: and then she will choke. But a second later she has felt, as they were separated, and Evgenie was rolled sideways.
- You the first.
- Go, wash. I after you.
To open eyes and to rise it was heavy. Alisa saw, that all round it was wrinkled and compressed, as if time released by it. Portieres at windows have become covered by small wrinkles, the plait rolled the bedsheets excited with action, and even its reflexion in a mirror blurred ripples as water in lake in windy day. Overcoming herself, she has smiled to Evgenie stretched on a bed and has trudged in a bathroom.
When it has returned, the bed has already been filled and laid by a coverlet. Any hope though somehow to add or change an event, does not remain. Evgenie in a fatherlike way has given smacking kiss to her in a forehead, for an instant has pressed to itself and has disappeared in a bathroom. In five minutes both have been dressed, brushed and stood at an entrance door with portfolios in hands.
- Lines you pobral. – One lips has said Alisa, having looked on hours. All — together with the conversations, imagined game in a blind-man's-buff, odevanijami-undressing and process of a coition has occupied only half an hour.
Evgenie, on the contrary, shone from pleasure – all were in time, as it and has planned. Now even for a meeting will be late no more, than for ten minutes, and it is quite admissible.
- You something have told?
- No, anything. – Alisa has answered it is angry, but he at all has not noticed it.
They left an entrance and silently, efficiently hasty, have dispersed every which way, as if people just faced in the lift. And watchman only accustomed to such business has carnivorously grinned behind their back.
Days lasted for Alisy intolerably long. It besides will stayed in extreme pressure, listening and looking narrowly from the tiny office to each rustle and movement in a corridor. To work it became intolerable. Ordinary affairs irritated her to a limit – all seemed empty, low and insignificant. Unique acknowledgement of that everything, that has occurred to it and Evgenie, was not a dream, its signatures on documents which she prepared served. Earlier all letters, all inquiries, all articles passed for the signature, came back ispolosovannye deletions and corrections. Alisa spent on a floor of day for disassembling these not as a real man a large scribble; to a pain in eyes got a grasp in its improbably illegible and, appear, contemptious podcherk. Now documents came back in the primordial form, assured by the wide signature. From this innovation Alise was simultaneously and it is sweet, and it is opposite.
Still she intolerably would like to speak about him. All the same with whom. It began a thicket to get out of the shelter and invariably it appeared in its reception. Each time was necessary to invent any small pretexts and when pretexts and imagination ran low – to be imposed in the girlfriend to its secretary. So there was a possibility to listen – Ira worked at the chief more than five years and knew all about its habits, character, manners. Probably, and it too has been secretly enamoured in the chief, and, can, has simply worked well together so, that did not think of itself without its presence, instructions and a management. Alisa felt, that they were not close – and found in Irishe secret, but so necessary for it, support.
Occasionally Alisa faced Evgenie in a reception or in a corridor. He smiled to it, greeted and went further on the is state-important issues.
So there passed weeks. Patience Alisy has run low. From time to time it hardly restrained not to rush to it into an office, not to pull out it for a collar because of the table filled up with papers and to shake, shake very much while it will not recollect, whom they were each other and will not dismiss impassable thickets of small and large affairs, obligations, decisions.
Alisa restrained. Evgenie did not recollect.
In one of the working days tightened late, it went on the become empty building to the lift. And suddenly, in the opposite end of a corridor, has seen Evgenie's coming nearer figure. He slowly walked to the office, on the move getting a grasp in any papers. Heart Alisy was compressed, and then was without restraint drove in. In a corridor they were one. Alisa has slowed down so that to have time to face Evgenie before it will need to curtail to the lift.
- Good evening, Evgenie Eduardovich! – its voice, despite a nervous tension, has sounded in an empty premise sonorously and accurately.
- Yes-a-a. – Evgenie has answered, not lifting eyes from the documents which have grasped it, and without a stop has walked further.
Alisa has stopped. Really has not noticed? It was automatically wore on a place, has deliberately loudly coughed – Evgenie has not turned back – and, absolutely lost, has trudged to the lift. Thoughts painful flashes arose in a brain – «has not answered with a view of conspiracy» she thought. «Is not present, cannot be – in the same place anybody, except us, was not». «Has not learnt my voice» — «yes that for delirium, learnt» earlier. «Means, simply has not noticed. Has not seen also all! And than I am better than innumerable quantity of others — those who daily servilely speaks« Hello, Evgenie Eduardovich! »Also does not receive the answer». Alisa left on air. The hot wind has blown directly in the person and has drained not had time to roll down from tear eyes.
Next morning all was as usually. Only here mood Alise spoilt by yesterday's incident did not manage to be corrected in any way. She also did not try to hide the condition and snatched as far as possible on all who came across under a hand. By a dinner the next call was distributed and, having seized a tube, Alisa has automatically spat out in it the set the teeth on edge phrase: «the Protocol Department, the Ministry for Foreign Affairs». The tube has unexpectedly answered Evgenie's with voice.
- Greetings. What's up?
Of unexpectedness Alisa has absolutely become puzzled.
- Let's meet tonight? In seven, in the same place.
In a tube any rustle, then some illegible voices was heard.
- Excuse, I will call back to you.
Alisa even to answer was in time nothing — in a tube short hooters were distributed.
It sat in a working armchair as on needles and waited for a call. Not finished text of the letter on the screen was replaced by darkness with logo Windows.
Three. The thick arrow creeps slowly, is dragged as a lazy snail – and it would be desirable to give from all force to it of a kick. Four. Silence the deaf person. Even in ears painfully. As on the harm, any to drag does not call – to break and that there is nobody. Five. Tens sheets of paper for the printer are spotted by red patterns – thin and intricate as Arabian vjaz. Alisa does not understand, that they mean – simply hand itself floats on a white surface, leaving bloody a track. Six. The call is not present. In a head – a fog. Well though, anybody does not have to it today affairs – neither forces to talk, nor forces to think. Six fifteen. The jig is up. even if it also remembers the appointed meeting – it is impossible to go anywhere! It is impossible to creep again on an occasion. Six twenty. What to do?! And suddenly he will take offence. Will become angry? After all it is really terribly occupied – well could not call! No. To hear I want nothing. Six twenty five. It is necessary to be strong. To dismiss all. I for it – an empty place, the yesterday's newspaper. I will not go! Six thirty.
Alisa has seized a bag and a bullet has jumped out in a corridor.
They have met at a familiar entrance exactly in seven. Have not told each other words and with concentration pretended, as if are not so familiar. Evgenie has typed a code. They silently have entered. The watchman has taken their understanding view and has professionally kept silent.
Alisa felt nasty. Evgenie Eduardovich was for it now far and inaccessible, seemed the alien. A physical cover for any reasons as at usual people; everything, that inside – secret, a riddle, chaos. This scarecrow, tormented and averted. Alisa could not imagine more than their affinity. Merge of the different worlds is impossible. It is unnatural.
The entrance door of apartment has swung open, zaglotnuv a two, and was silently closed. Evgenie took at Alisy a bag and has put it on a shelf at an input.
- Well, hi. – it has pressed it to itself(himself) and began to shake silently, as if lulling. – I so on you missed! It was absolutely rolled up. Simply out of itself.
- You fairly missed? – Voice Alisy has sounded chilly and tensely.
- Again you wish me to offend. Yes. I on you miss.
- Yesterday you at all have not noticed me.
- What?! – Evgenie outright was surprised.
- Here so – has rigidly told Alisa — I have greeted, and you of anything to me in the answer have not told.
- I you saw yesterday? No, pogodi. Anything similar I do not remember.
- At seven o'clock in the evening. You went to yourselves. Read any papers. Have practically rested against me a nose and on mine «Good evening, Evgenie Eduardovich» have answered "Yes". What "yes"?
- postoj, I such do not remember anything. Really we met yesterday?
- I do not know as you, and I precisely met you.
- The girl washing, excuse, it is glad the God. – Evgenie has been confused, that looked extremely unusually. – well, the word of honour – I do not remember! Similar, at me with a head already the disorder. One of these days in general has forgotten where went – it was necessary to come back in an office and painfully to recollect. So much all has pulled hard! Circle of a problem, a problem.
Alisa listened, as he all mutters a never-ending stream of phrases less distinctly. It became a pity to it it. She always knew, that it works madly much, but that the service became the unique world in which it could exist, is too. Meanwhile, that all other sides of life were used up and have merged for it in uniform heavy and nervous weight – Job was similar.
As Alise it would be desirable to pull out it from this bog, to pull out from under weight of the pulled hard problems! She already and to think has forgotten about the insignificant insults and experiences. The main thing consisted in forcing it to distract from this burden, to give to its thoughts and a body a respite.
Alisa has approached the lips to his lips and gentle as easy whiff of a wind, a kiss has stopped senseless, to a floor a coherent stream of words. It became the harmless snake warmed by the sun by a liana who, caressing, courted around its bodies, hardly touched, and shrouded in heat. Evgenie stood, having covered eyelids, and did not move. For an instant Alise it seemed, that he feels nothing. It has lifted on it eyes and how its black eyelashes shook, has understood, that it nearby, that its body accepts and absorbs its touches. So they stood long – it, giving all tenderness and caress, it – with silent gratitude it accepting. Then Evgenie hardly has sat down strong to clasp Alisu for a waist, has lifted it and has carried away in a bedroom.
He slowly and cautiously undressed her, showering with short and hot kisses. Alisa it was bent in his hands. Touches all became more exacting. Trousers have been rejected on a floor after a jacket. Evgenie has laid down on a back and has planted Alisu on itself. It moved slowly, as if lulling and lulling. At first Evgenie laid without movement, and has then started to help it measured pushes. They began to move faster, and Evgenie, not in forces to restrain longer, has turned Alisu on a back and has finished begun by the cascade of powerful and weighty pushes.
They have turned over sideways and laid, having merged in a long kiss.
- To you it was good? – Evgenie has started talking the first.
- Yes. Simply remarkably.
- I am glad. – it has turned over on a back and has drawn Alisu to itself on a breast.
It laid motionlessly and did not know, whether it is necessary to tell something in the answer. Evgenie gradually again became not only and not so much its beloved, how much the obscure, inaccessible person.
- Why you are silent?
- I do not know about what to speak. – she really did not know. It was possible, if the boldness suffices, to assort their own relations or that is worse – to mill bones to employees of the Ministry. But besides to head Alise came nothing.
- Whether yes it is not enough. For certain something in a life is interesting to you.
- Well to us, Gegel in bed to discuss? – Alisa has answered unexpectedly sharply.
- And who it? – Evgenie has not paid attention to its tone, but has looked at the girl with sincere curiosity.
- Oh you, My God. – Alisa was surprised and, itself not knowing why, has become angry simultaneously. – at you that, in MGIMO did not teach philosophy?
- Taught. – Evgenie has shrugged shoulders. — but same so a long time was.
It laid, having stretched in all growth. Alisa did not begin to continue. It is useless. It has simply physically felt, how it is devastated and quiet – to it neither to what there was no now a business. Nor before job, neither to it, nor before their senseless chatter. It could dismiss all and had simply a rest, using the moment.
- It is possible, I will go to a shower? — Alisa has slipped out its embraces.
- Go, certainly. – he has nodded a head and, having turned over sideways, has covered eyes.
It has climbed in a per capita booth, has opened the crane and has directed itself to the person ice water.
Today Evgenie did not hurry up anywhere. It long pottered in a bathroom, then put on even longer.
- You know, you go. – it is lazy he has told. — and I here will a little put all in order and too I will go.
It was on the threshold, gently smiling. And Alisa was surprised, how it could condescend it before cleaning any there.
- Perhaps to me something to help? – She has uncertainly asked.
- Yes is not present, I. – it Has waved away. — and all the same to leave better on one. By the way, under conspiracy laws it is not necessary to meet more than three times in the same place. It would be necessary to think up something.
Evgenie has strong pressed Alisu to itself, has kissed on the mouth, has in a pointed manner moaned from pleasure and with forced enough regret has pushed her to a door.
- Well, go, go. We will meet tomorrow.
Tomorrow they have not met. Alisa did not leave the office casually not to give out itself. Evgenie did not call. She rushed about from a table to a window, trying to distract from thoughts on him. She hated that herself, it. It seemed to it that the full silly person, the ignoramus, which God knows how has risen on such tops in a life the state genius who to trifles knows the business and consequently so much years keep afloat. She that admired and proud of it was ashamed of it. In her head clouds of the images designed from details, chains of the invented events were carried by. It on small screws assorted their meetings, endeavouring to understand where it has committed an error, that has made not so. With anybody she is not dared to discuss that was. Could tell to nobody on what reflected. All its thoughts have been turned only to her. They corroded it, tormented, destroyed. Only before herself she was responsible for sodejannoe.
Gradually, slowly the life began to fall back into place. Alisa diligently distracted from digging in itself, inventing a heap of urgent matters and questions. Sometimes these affairs arose in itself and relieved it of an unnecessary headache. She still listened, sitting at a desktop, to that occurs in a corridor, but has learnt to force itself to close a door and not to catch each time for trying to jump out heart when to it Evgenie's voice was heard.
In the evenings she did not dare to remain at home – bought tickets that in theatre at cinema or simply wandered on huge bookshops, diligently combing numbers of infinite shelves. One week has replaced another. The summer has turned back in the autumn which has diligently painted streets in oranzhevo-yellowy-brown colours. The sun shone in the afternoon still brightly, but by the evening hasty fell for horizon as if having been tired to death and aspiring somewhat quicker to fall asleep. And then the impenetrable darkness went down. Only yellow stains of light which threw lanterns on asphalt of the central streets, did not allow to a city to fall asleep.
Evgenie did not call. Did not search with Alisoj for meetings. There was no it in a sudden vice when their ways were suddenly crossed in secluded corners of the Ministry – only is underlined politely greeted. And all. It seemed, it with new force was accepted to job and is not intended to lose more minutes – in office only and spoke about its absolutely irrepressible energy. The new ideas, the new people, new successes – all it has surrounded it, has grasped, has carried away.
For Alisy all became same as was before. It has returned to abyss of ordinary affairs and a black melancholy. Has allowed small cares to drag off it in whirlpool of a senseless life. The letters written by it, inquiries and articles which were coming back to it with its signature without a uniform blot were a unique reminder that it has not descended for some time from mind, having invented this to nobody the necessary history.
30.05.2007 15:52 it is very good as well as all your stories it is written. Short capacious offers. With sense. The good story!
21.08.2007 13:24 Strange sensation when you read and seems, as if it about you though to you in general and there was nothing similar. But painfully exact words, exact images. Not so long ago I saw the program "At this time of night" in which Berman, in my opinion, tried to entice with predilection from Victor Yerofeev the answer to a question (accurate information I do not remember, but sense I pass without distortion): "And whether there is a book which is written not by you, but you dreamt to write it as if someone another has written all for you?" "Yes, - almost Yerofeev at once has answered, - such book is, it is Vasily Pavlovicha Aksenova's"Island Crimea". Here at me, Diana, such book are your stories. My female ranki as the cracked asphalt which someone has made out and has fixed. I, probably, so (in such style) also would began to write itself. But I cannot. I am not able. There is no either talent, or a patience, wisdom. Therefore I from the bottom of the heart wish you - to write! To write, while there is time and forces! And with huge impatience I wait for your book!
21.09.2007 15:47 Accurate images. But it is cold. Something warm if it is possible.))) Thanks.
05.10.2007 14:23 As soon as there is a possibility look on your site to have a rest soul, I will tell only one-WAS magnificent...
07.10.2007 22:38 Diana, I has correctly drawn a conclusion: do not sleep with muzhiks simply so? At first them it is necessary to detain, force to make efforts, and then... That all has not ended, how in the story? From personal experience.
09.10.2007 14:39 Alexanders, I would not began so to formulate sense of the story, but also I will not deny similar treatment. And if from personal experience - it is not necessary to play feelings, it is necessary to live them. Fairly, with full return, without compromises and without pretence. And in the told history there was no love. Only games in it.
17.11.2007 22:51 So all is banal..... Anything except disappointment has not tested... Whether it is necessary to write about it...
25.11.2007 20:07 I Think, costs all the same. Everyone lives the, unique life and let better people do conclusions of errors of literary characters, than make own...
09.12.2007 15:15 it was not probably valid love, but nevertheless it was necessary to it, as well as it to it during any moments. And I would not consider it as an error, it is a life and it is experience. They will go further everyone the by.
12.12.2007 14:55 Personal I opyt-meet the same occupied person, but we strangely enough love each other, though to me to 24 it 48, at both families.... I about what do not regret, and I wish our of good luck with it, we together BUT if we had all here so, I could not, though at us the first sex was very spontaneous and unforeseen, casual, but IT the real man and was so much tenderness and caresses, likely therefore all of us still together, I consider, that it is humiliating to be udovletvorjalkoj 1r/month, not feeling, it is mechanics to it it has replaced the fist.... So it is impossible! But the story cool! I will come on this site once again, today I was here for the first time.
28.12.2007 19:55 First times has come on your site. Has decided to esteem and I liked your story. I will necessarily read others.
23.01.2008 00:19 Yes it abruptly. Really you transfer yourself to this story)
01.02.2008 19:46 Greetings to all from a city of Yakutsk:)! Zdrastvujte Diana Mashkov! Very much:) well write it is fresh and it is interesting! It would be desirable to read that nibud the youth:))
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© Mashkova Irina Vladimirovna, 2007
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